Over the last three days everything has been going down hill for me, really. To be absolutely honest, I make a lot of mistakes. I have too many things about myself that make every single little problem I have more difficult than it should be. I over react, think too much, care too much, worry too much, and I'm stubborn. Those are my biggest problems. I can't be a good girlfriend to Joey if I act rediculous all the time. I've been working on it though. We won't be together till I fix these things about myself because I hurt him. All I want is for him to be happy and I'd do anything to make him that way. It hurts me to hurt him.
I cried harder than I have in a long time earlier today. Absolutely broke down while I had family over. I took a shower to calm myself like I normally would and that didn't even help. I just cried in the shower till it got too cold and I didn't want to shiver. I don't want to bother my family about the same ol problem as always, so I didn't. I'm going to stay awake all night because I don't want to try to sleep and be disappointed or aggrivated when I can't. So fuck it.
Besides that, I'm watching family guy.
Cool.
In every blogpost I have I'll have a list of good things, and the brightsides. There are always brightsides to things and I refuse to be depressed.
So brightsides, I will get better and will be with Joey. Christmas is in nine days and I'm excited to see all of my family I haven't seen all year. I'll be getting a new camera soon to work more on my photography. Jake makes me laugh every single day, and makes me happy for at least that time when Im extremely upset.
That's really the only things I see at the moment. Thumbs up for those. Whoop.
I'm going to play my DS, and kick some ass on my new game.